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ALABAMA ~
 
"Yes, we have electricity"
 
 
ALASKA ~
 
"We also take American money"
 
 
ARIZONA ~
 
"But It's a Dry Heat"
 
 
ARKANSAS ~
 
"Litterasy Ain't Everthing"
 
 
CALIFORNIA ~
 
"As Seen on TV"
 
 
COLORADO ~
 
"If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother"
 
 
CONNECTICUT ~
 
"Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and With Less Character"
 
 
DELAWARE ~
 
"We Really Do Like the Chemicals in our Water"
 
 
FLORIDA ~
 
"Ask Us About Our Grandkids"
 

GEORGIA ~
"We Put the "Fun" in Fundamentalist Extremism"
 
HAWAII ~
 
"Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru"
  (Death to Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)

 
 
IDAHO ~
 
"Potatoes and Neo Nazi's ... What More
  Could You Ask For?"

 
 
ILLINOIS ~
 
"Please Don't Pronounce the "S"
 
 
INDIANA ~
 
"2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free"
 
 
IOWA ~
 
"We Do Amazing Things With Corn"
 
 
KANSAS ~
 
"Where Science Don't Mean Shit"
 
 
KENTUCKY ~
 
"Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names"
 
 
LOUISIANA ~
 
"We're Not All Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign"
 
 
MAINE ~
 
"We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster"
 
 
MARYLAND ~
 
"A Thinking Man's Delaware"
 
 
MASSACHUSETTS ~
 
"Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's
  (For Most Tax Brackets)

 
 
MICHIGAN ~
 
"First Line of Defense From the Canadians"
 
 
MINNESOTA ~
 
"10,000 Lakes and 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes"
 
 
MISSISSIPPI ~
 
"Come Feel Better About Your Own State"
 
 
MISSOURI ~
 
"Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars at Work"
 
 
MONTANA ~
 
"Land of the Big Sky, the Unabomber, Right-wing Crazies, and Very
   Little Else"

 
 
NEBRASKA ~
 
"Ask About Our State Motto Contest"
 
 
NEVADA ~
 
Two words - "Hookers and Poker"
 
 
NEW HAMPSHIRE ~
 
"Go Away and Leave Us Alone"
 
 
NEW JERSEY ~
 
"You Want a Frickin' Motto? I Got Yer Frickin' Motto Right Here!"
 
 
NEW MEXICO ~
 
"Lizards Make Excellent Pets"
 
 
NEW YORK ~
 
"You Have the Right to Remain Silent, You Have the Right to an
   Attorney..."

 
 
NORTH CAROLINA ~
 
"Tobacco is a Vegetable"
 
 
NORTH DAKOTA ~
 
"We Really are One of the 50 States!"
 
 
OHIO ~
 
"At Least We're Not Michigan"
 
 
OKLAHOMA ~
 
"Like the Play, only No Singing"
 
 
OREGON ~
 
"Spotted Owl... It's What's For Dinner"
 
 
PENNSYLVANIA ~
 
"Cook With Coal"
 
 
RHODE ISLAND ~
 
"We're Not REALLY An Island"
 
 
SOUTH CAROLINA ~
 
"Remember the Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender"
 
 
SOUTH DAKOTA ~
 
"Closer Than North Dakota"
 
 
TENNESSEE ~
 
"The Educashun State"
 
TEXAS ~
 
"Si' Hablo Ing'les"
  (Yes, I speak English)

 
 
UTAH ~
 
"Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus"
 
 
VERMONT ~
 
"Yep"
 
 
VIRGINIA ~
 
"Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?"
 
 
WASHINGTON ~
 
"Help! We're Overrun By Nerds and Slackers!"
 
 
WASHINGTON D.C. ~
 
"Got crack?"
 
 
WEST VIRGINIA ~
 
"One Big Happy Family - No, really!"
 
 
WISCONSIN ~
 
"Come Cut Our Cheese"
 
 
WYOMING ~
 
"Where men are men and sheep are scared"

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