Santa Must Be a Woman
Man vs. Woman /
Thanks to Lisa for sending this one!
Santa MUST be a WOMAN!
don't know how to pack a bag.
Most men wouldn't be caught dead wearing red velvet.
don't even think about selecting gifts until after lunch on Christmas Eve.
aren't interested in stockings unless some gal is wearing them.
Santa were a man, everyone in the universe would wake up Christmas morning to
find Ronco products, socket wrench sets and Chia Pets still in the bag from
Santa were a man, he would have no reindeer, because they would all be dead,
gutted and strapped across the front of the sleigh, and Blitzen's rack would
already be on the way to the taxidermist.
if he did find some way to power the sleigh, he's never get to everyone's
house because he would get lost up there in the snow and never stop to ask for
would feel their masculinity is threatened by having to be seen with all those
would refuse to allow their physique to be described, even in jest, as
anything remotely resembling a 'bowl full of jelly.'
Having to do the 'Ho Ho Ho' thing would seriously inhibit their ability to
pick up chicks.