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JLVeer sent this one:
If You Grew Up in
the Rural Midwest:
You know how to polka, but never tried it sober.
You know what knee-high by the Fourth of July means.
You know it is traditional for the bride and
groom to go bar hopping between the reception and wedding
You know the difference between "Green" and "Red" farm machinery,
And would fight with your friends on the playground
over which was better!
You buy Christmas presents at Fleet Farm.
You spent more on beer & liquor than you did on food at your
You hear someone use the word "oof-dah" and you
don't break into uncontrollable laughter.
You or someone you know was a "Dairy Princess"
at the county fair.
You know that "combine" is a noun.
You let your older siblings talk you into
putting your tongue on a steel post in the middle of winter.
You know Lutheran and Catholic are THE major
You know that "creek" rhymes with "pick".
Football schedules, hunting season and harvest
are all taken into consideration before wedding dates are set.
A Friday night date is getting a six-pack and taking your
Girlfriend shining for deer.
Saturday you go to your local bowling alley.
There was at least one, if not several, in your
class who had to help milk cows in the morning.
You have driven your car on the lake.
You can make sense of "upnort" and "baatree".
Every wedding dance you have ever been to has the hokey
pokey and the chicken dance.
Your definition of a small town is one that only has one bar.
The local gas station sells live bait.
At least twice a year some part of your home doubles as a meat
You think that the start of deer season is a national holiday.
You actually understand these jokes and will
forward them to all your Midwest friends!
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