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Thanks to Deaf Bob for sending this one!

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!

I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it...so I said, "Implants?"

I always take life with a grain of salt, plus a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila.

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. I have a work station.

Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever.

Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?