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Thanks to Poobah for sending this one!

Now that football season is upon us, it's a good time to
 get in the mood by reading these quotations from well known football
 "At Georgia Southern, we don't cheat. That costs money
 and we don't have any." Erk Russell / Georgia Southern.
 "Football is only a game. Spiritual things are eternal.
 Nevertheless, Beat Texas." Seen on a church sign in Arkansas prior to
 the 1969 game.
 "After you retire, there's only one big event
 left....and I ain't ready for that." Bobby Bowden / Florida State
 "The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is
 likely to be the one who dropped it." Lou Holtz / Arkansas
 "When you win, nothing hurts." Joe Namath / Alabama
 "Motivation is simple. You eliminate those who are not
 motivated." Lou Holtz / Arkansas
 "A school without football is in danger of deteriorating
 into a medieval study hall." Frank Leahy / Notre Dame
 "I don't expect to win enough games to be put on NCAA
 probation. I just want to win enough to warrant an investigation." Bob
 Devaney / Nebraska
 "In Alabama, an atheist is someone who doesn't believe
 in Bear Bryant." Wally Butts / Georgia
 "You can learn more character on the two-yard line than
 anywhere else in life." Paul Dietzel / LSU
 "It's kind of hard to rally around a math class." Bear
 Bryant / Alabama
 "No, but you can see it from here." Lou Holtz /
 Arkansas...When asked if Fayetteville was the end of the world.
 "I make my practices real hard because if a player is a
 quitter, I want him to quit in practice, not in a game." Bear Bryant /
 "Lads, you're not to miss practice unless your parents
 died or you died." Frank Leahy / Notre Dame
 "I never graduated from Iowa, but I was only there for
 two terms - Truman's and Eisenhower's." Alex Karras / Iowa
 "My advice to defensive players: Take the shortest route
 to the ball and arrive in a bad humor." Bowden Wyatt / Tennessee
 "I could have been a Rhodes Scholar, except for my
 grades." Duffy Daugherty / Michigan State
 "Always remember..... Goliath was a 40 point favorite
 over David." Shug Jordan / Auburn
 "They cut us up like boarding house pie. And that's real
 small pieces." Darrell Royal / Texas
 "Show me a good and gracious loser, and I'll sh ow you a
 fa ilure." Knute Rockne / Notre Dame
 "They whipped us like a tied up goat." Spike Dykes /
 Texas Tech
 "I asked Darrell Royal, the coach of the Texas
 Longhorns, why he didn't recruit me and he said: "Well, Walt, we took a
 look at you and you weren't any good." Walt Garrison / Oklahoma State
 "Son, you've got a good engine, but your hands aren't on
 the steering wheel." Bobby Bowden / Florida State
 "Football is not a contact sport-it is a collision
 sport. Dancing is a contact sport." Duffy Daugherty / Michigan State
 After USC lost 51-0 to Notre Dame, his post game message
 to his team: "All those who need showers, take them." John McKay / USC
 "If lessons are learned in defeat, our team is getting a
 great education." Murray Warmath / Minnesota
 "The only qualifications for a lineman ar e to be big and
 dumb. To be a back, you only have to be dumb." Knute Rockne / Notre Dame
 "Oh, we played about like three tons of buzzard puke
 this afternoon." Spike Dykes / Texas Tech
 "It isn't necessary to see a good tackle. You can hear
 it." Knute Rockne / Notre Dame
 "We didn't tackle well today but we made up for it by
 not blocking." John McKay / USC
 "I've found that prayers work best when you have big
 players." Knute Rockne / Notre Dame
 "Gentlemen, it is better to have died a small boy than
 to fumble this football" John Heisman 

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