The Animal Whisperer         Redneck  /  Jokes  /  Home

The animal whisperer could talk to animals, and they would talk back in a human voice.  The whisperer went to visit a redneck out in the country.

Whisperer:  I'd like to talk with your animals.  I can talk to them and they'll talk back.

Redneck:  Animals cayn't talk!   But go ahead, let's see whatcha got (The redneck cracks another beer open).

Whisperer:  Hey dog, how's it going?

Dog:  Purdy good, really.  Not too bad.

Redneck:  (Look of total astonishment)

Is this your owner? (Points to the redneck)

Dog:  Yep.

Whisperer:  How's he treating you?

Dog:  Naht too bad.  He throws us some table scraps every day and he lets us sleep under the porch over there in front of the trailer.  The steps are kinda fallin' in, and sometimes it rains, but it's still a good place to sleep.

Whisperer to Redneck:  Mind if I talk to your cat?

Redneck:  I don't know how yer doin' this shit.  That cat can't talk, and the dawg cayn't either,  But go ahead and try.

Whisperer:  How are you doing, cat?

Cat:  Okay, I guess.  The dawgs get all the attention, but I get to sleep under the trailer where it's dry, and the dawgs can't fit under there through the hole.

Redneck:  (About to pass out from disbelief)

Whisperer to Redneck:  I see a sheep over there.  Mind if I talk to her?

Redneck:  Now you wait a minute there, City Boy.  That sheep's been a damn liar all her life, you can count on it!

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